yoga review: is “body balance” (les mills) hard?

Burning questions/recent googles:

1) Has Thomas from Downton Abbey put on weight in season 2? (yes)

2) Coconut flour tortillas and:

3) Is Body Balance hard?

Unfortunately for #3 the interweb is nothing if not inconsistent.  Reviews range from ‘massively hard work’ to ‘i love the 5 minutes sleep at the end of the class’.

Definitive answer: it’s pretend exercise for people who don’t like to work out.  Perfect for when you want to do something but you can’t actually be bothered.   The 55 minute format is:  Tai Chi,  Yoga, Pilates, Sleep.  Sleep aside, these should all have “quotation marks”.  I’m sure the ancient yogic/tai chi dudes are horrified to learn their philosophy has been diluted to into 5 minutes routines performed to covers of pop songs (thanks for changing the pricing structure for group fitness, music industry).

But anyway, my aim in life is to move for at least half an hour everyday so it satisfied that basic criteria.  (And it was free.)

the algorithums behind dating websites

In this “Big Ideas” podcast – What does our technology future look like? –  Australian Anthropologist Genevieve Bell talks about her work as a social scientist for Intel.  It’s fascinating stuff!  Premise is that women in their 40’s, 50’s and 60’s are the biggest users of social media, texting, skpe, etc.  Which means getting jiggy with the youth of today isn’t really the way forward if you’re wanting to flog a new fangled whatsit.

a new fangled whatsit

What’s most interesting though, is a throw away remark she makes about the algorithms behind dating websites; they’re the rules that are used to match people up.  While eHarmony and co are loathe to disclose too much – “they’re our ‘secret sauce’” – one example from a ‘major dating website’ is that couples are more likely to click if the male is between 2 and 3 inches taller than the female.

!!!!

pavlova and wang (also: highs and lows)

I made three pavlovas this weekend, all of which failed.  Two refused to form ‘soft peaks’ during the beating stage and the third I discovered was undercooked  only when serving it up.  By then it was too late and no amount of coaxing could induce it to hard up.  ‘Harden up, pavlova’, I said.  ‘….’, said the pavlova.  Then Carney kicked a cupboard but that was completely unrelated.  Without wanting to harp Paula Joyce/Stephanie Alexander/Nigella Lawson, your recipe is Fucked. Up.  I hate your recipe.  And so do the chickens that gave birth to 18 eggs, sacrificed for noothing.

On a more positive note, upcoming Queens birthday weekend = funnest girls weekend ever!  I’m Oprah studio audience ‘you just gave me a biscuit’ excited:

I’m line 1, position 3: ‘oh-my-gah….’ source

Destination: Wangaratta.  Activities include ‘Winemakers of Rutherglen’ wine tour AND meat pies at the foozeball.  ROAD TRIP!

traffic avoiding dinners

When Carney is Not Getting Stuck in Traffic (i.e. having take away for dinner) I am cooking My Delicious Pumpkin and Other Vegetable Soup.  Recipe?  Carefully selected ingredients?  Pfft.  I cook from the heart and am guided by the soul…  Today’s was tumeric + parsley in addition to the obvious (vegetables, stock), simmered, then stick-blended.  Aerial view:

You’re welcome.

And oh look, here’s a picture of our amazing oven.  We’re so fancy!

Also made: Chia + raspberry pudding from Sarah Wilson’s IQS cookbook.  I have to let it soak overnight.  Overnight is ages, I hate waiting for overnight.

Hurry the fark up morning!

the seed of life (ambiguous title series)

My bro-ski gave me some awesome cereal.  It’s this:

I don’t want to rub your wheet bix/coco pop-eating faces in it, but what it loses in looking like birdseed it more than makes up for by being the best, most superfood-laden cereal eva.   If photos of Kapai Puku founder Greame Johnstone are anything to go by it is the food for ripped, dog walkers with excellent teeth (and their aspirants).   Basically, the only way this cereal could get any better would be if my man GJ had been enormous before creating Kapai Puku and then become an iron man.  Just saying GJ, everyone loves a makeover.

Only downer is Carney keeps cherry picking the seed encrusted raisons (best bit), which is killing me.  KILLING ME…  Sad(/murderous) face.

Oh, and virtually no sugar.  Exclamation mark!

unexpected passions: sam pang

Sam Pang wears vests, which I am all for.  He was vest-clad while hosting “Unexpected Passions” at the Wheeler Centre.  Tom Elliot (son of John) and Lawrence Mooney (lineage unknown) were guests.  LM redeemed himself somewhat (comedy festival misses); he waxed lyrical about his Vanity Fair obsession/collection.  TE’s love was of bomber pilots in WWI.  Bomber pilots got a bum deal – not only most likely to die (45% death rate!) but also not decorated with medals.  Or indeed, other decorative items, vests included.  Tom has an actual wartime bunker with model planes and maps at his house, which is at once impressive and potentially creepy. 

Geeta, Neil from work and I were all in attendance.  Sam Pang and Geeta should totally hook up; they’re both lovely.

I love the Wheeler Centre.

sam pang: if not vests, then leiderhosen

good reads: best-o

Thank heavens for Good Reads.  I love it!  Two of the nicest, bestest, most compelling books I’ve come across this year were recommendations from Good Reads Random Recommendation Generator: Wonder by R. J. Palacio and The Fault in Our Stars by John Green.  Go to, go to!

Wonder:  10 year old August has a pretty major facial deformity; “I won’t describe what I look like.  Whatever you’re thinking it’s probably worse” .  Auggie starts the fifth grade after having been homeschooled his whole life; it’s a really sweet and heartwarming tale. 

The Fault Our Stars: Hazel, 16  has an incurable cancer.  She meets Augustus who used to have cancer.  They fall in lurve.  Dreary sounding but the writing is funny and clever (and not in a Kathy “I so sassy” Lette kind of a way*).

*Uugh, Kathy Lette….  She should have a love child with Bryce Courtenay and they can like, write a best seller about an unloved, orphan who a) teaches a small, redneck town about racial prejudice and b) wears tight leather pants/fisticuffs/stilletto pumps.  Sample protagonist catchcry:  “We’re all the same colour on the inside!  Let’s go buy designer shoes and handbags!”.